LIVER IS LOOKIN' PRETTY GOOD

I had the opportunity to read some of my poems to the elementary classes of Living Word Academy. This one always got a big reaction from the students!

The Grossest Lunch I Ever Ate
by Tammy Pringle

The grossest lunch I ever ate
I have to say, I did not hate
The french fried ants were crispy crunchy
The toenail chips, yummy munchy
Two boogie burgers moist and chewy
A mud milkshake, thick and gooey

I ate it all, enjoyed each bite
and that's the truth
Well no, not quite . . .
The reason I enjoyed that meal
Was because it wasn't really real!

BE GLAD IT'S NOT FLU SEASON!

The Fluky Flu
by Tammy Pringle

One thing you never want to do
is come down with the Fluky Flu
This type of flu is highly contagious
And it's symptoms are extremely outrageous!
It makes you look and feel quite funny
Your nose swells up and then gets runny
Your lips disappear and your eyes bulge out
It's an awful flu without a doubt!
It turns your face green, the color of Shrek,
And makes your eyebrows grow down to your neck
Feathers appear in your nose holes and ears
And you must pluck them out or they'll stay there five years
Your tongue pops out and sticks to your chin
And purple goosebumps cover your skin
Your fingers and toes will glow in the dark
And when you open your mouth, you'll just hiccup and bark.

Now if you should catch the Fluky Flu
There is a cure, here's what you must do:
Stand on your head and count to ten
Then say something nice to a neighbor or friend
Close your eyes and hop up and down
Smile at someone who's wearing a frown
Give yourself a hug and someone else too,
Say to your parents, "I love you."
Do all these things if you want to get better
If you don't, your symptoms will last FOREVER!

HEY, KIDS! DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU!

Big Billy Blooth
by Tammy Pringle

Do you happen to know Big Billy Blooth?
He's a rather large guy with one little tooth
He ate too much sugar when he was small
and he did not visit the dentist at all
He never brushed and never flossed
so all his teeth but one he's lost

Now he's big, but can't eat sweets
He can't eat snacks or any treats
It's hard for him to talk, whistle or sing
It's hard for him to do a lot of things
He misses his teeth, and that's the truth
'Cause it's not much fun being a unitooth!

SURVEY RESULTS - WEEK OF 5/22

We have a winner! "Giving" was the overall favorite, getting 68% of your votes. Thank you to all who participated. It is interesting and helpful for me to see the results. Also, feel free to leave comments and/or suggestions by clicking on the word, "comments" below each poem.

PLEASE VOTE!

I am in the process of getting a compilation of my poems together for publishing. I am also pursuing using my poems to minister to the children in the pediatric wards of some of the Lancaster hospitals.

I would greatly appreciate it if you would check in from time to time to read my poems and vote on your favorites (in the survey box to the right). I value voters of all ages - that includes children, as they are my target audience, and also their parents, as they are the consumers - and everyone in-between (grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc.)! Your votes will help me when making editing decisions for both endeavors.

New poems and a new survey will be posted every week or two, so keep checking back! Thanks so much for your input, I greatly appreciate it.

THE PRICE OF PERSUASION

NO!
by Tammy Pringle

No! No way!
Absolutely not!
Not a chance that I shall
Not for all the money you've got

Go ahead and beg
It will do you no good
I'm not giving in
Though the whole world thinks I should

Hang me upside down
By my left big toe
And I'll answer you the same
Read my lips, "N-O!"

Not if Mickey Mouse
Turns into Mickey Cow
I will not, I won't
No way, no how!

You may whine, you may plead
You may think me unkind
But not today nor any day
Will I change my mind

Not for all the green in Greenland
Not for all the gum in Guam
Never, ever, ever!
Even if you tell my mom

Not for -
A PAIR OF MOTORIZED ROCKET ROLLER BLADES CUSTOM SIZED?!!
Well, I suppose that . . . maybe . . .
I might possibly be bribed!

REMINDS ME OF A LITTLE BOY I KNOW . . .

I am doing some "spring cleaning," going through the many many poems I have hibernating inside my computer. I thought I'd share this one written from the mock innocent persepective of a little boy accused of being selfish. It's an act that is often performed at my house!

Giving
by Tammy Pringle

People say I'm selfish
but I don't think that it is true.
Why just last week I gave my sister
pink eye and the flu.

Today I gave my brother
not one, but TWO dirty looks.
And I give my dinner to the dog
the nights my father cooks.

Why I've been known to gladly share
my last piece of stale gum.
And if I had a box of dirt
I'd even part with some.

People say I'm selfish,
I'm not sure of what they mean,
since I really tried to give away
my smushed white jelly beans!

Others just aren't grateful
for the giving that I do
But something else I've noticed -
my folks are giving too.

When I disobey my mom,
she gives me a time out.
And if I cry and throw a fit
Dad gives me something REAL to cry about!